when you drop it like its hot

I dropped my stress ball and it rolled under my bed! I hate it when I drop things these days. Picking them up ain’t easy anymore. My spine attempts to snap with every bend. With my growing belly and never ending backaches, who would love to keep on stooping? My toes are even starting to disappear.

There are just some things in my life that I wish I didn’t drop – ‘coz it ain’t easy picking them up at all. There is a snap at every bend. Much more than that, there are mortalities. Some of them I cannot bring back to life, not in any form. Counting on the things that I have lost, it makes me feel so undeserving of the things that I have found along the way. Getting my way out of this confusion is a journey that I wish I could step into the light upon its culmination, without seeing heaven.

Like the morning begins the day, there are always new things to be found to compensate on the things that one has dropped and lost. If it rolled under some bed, there’s always a way to get it out of there. If there are no other ways, then there are other opportunities.

In college, I dropped a five-unit Chemistry class to make more time for campus journalism.I end up blogging.

=)

tuesdays with morrie

http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6900.Tuesdays_with_Morrie_An_Old_Man_a_Young_Man_and_Life_s_Greatest_Lesson">Tuesdays with Morrie: An Old Man, a Young Man, and Life's Greatest Lesson by http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2331.Mitch_Albom">Mitch Albom


Sad, but fortunate.
Not all of us will have the chance to foresee our death. As it is certain, it has no estimated time of arrival, whatsoever. Thus, lucky are those who had the time to say goodbye. The luckiest is Mitch.Aside from being able to say goodbye, he was able to learn life's greatest lesson: that nothing can feel more love than the heart - neither can the eyes see beauty than the heart.
I just hope that I would get the same chance everytime a loved one will drift off to eternity. That I would know when so, I will be able to show them the all the love that they deserve. When it is my time to go, I wish to have the same opportunity. That I will be able to share the wisdom that life has taught me.
http://www.goodreads.com/review/list/2708609-faith-ann">View all my reviews >>

putting the chicken and the egg to a halt

Its disarming when philosophy disproves your notion. Just recently, I was so certain that it was the egg first before the chicken, that the idea of the egg was formed first before the chicken came to be. It was just a process of evolution that brought the chicken about.

Just few minutes ago, I was doing some online reading on philosophical inquiries and the argument from motion, my belief was shattered. Yes, the chicken came before the egg. The reason is:

“Since actuality precedes potentiality, the chicken precedes the egg.”

Both agreed upon by Aquinas and Aristotle. I am no philosopher, what can I say then? I have my Foreign Language class tomorrow and I don’t think this is of any relevance, why do I keep on digging into philosophy anyway? Now, I’m in too deep, so I would rather face it.


More than the chicken coming before the egg, the idea that actuality precedes potentiality has struck me in another way. As a writer, why do I read and research before I get into my writing. Why do I have to have my stories based on some facts when I can make it a whole lot different? I have a free world. The reason is just the same: actuality precedes potentiality - whatever is moved, is moved by another.

A touch of reality gives life to a dream. The present gives birth to the future. With what we experience, growth is bred, and so does wisdom.

Hopefully, this is the culmination of the chicken and the egg askance for me. I would rather be asked how I was made or how I came to be. I will definitely give you a reason or even a story that no philosopher can argue about.

…Sorry Dad, for being so nosy I read your college diary…I may be wrong about the chicken and the egg but I know exactly how I was made!!! :-)

the choiceless attack

Waking up with the laundry undelivered and a swollen eye may not be categorized under a “good morning” but that could not prevent a great day from happening. The microwave just stopped working, though late last night it made a perfect mac and cheese heating – how can they happen all at once? Maybe because its Friday. Maybe because it has to happen.

Getting pissed off makes me think more than I usually do. It makes me patient – makes me experience sublimation. You experience a lot when there is nothing you can do about certain situations. Just like wanting to be asleep when you have a pile of tasks on the deadline. When you are left choiceless, you make the right decisions, or breathe a little for a while to clear the mind.

After all, a grit that lasts will ruin the teeth.

love is a slow kiss goodnight

My first encounter with this selection was way back in college...when i was seeking to understand love. Instead, it was love who understood me.


Love is a slow kiss goodnight.It´s anticipation.

Love is an imperfection in yourself not bothering you.It´s acceptance.
Love is passing up an opportunity because the time isn´t right yet.It´s patience.
Love is a back massage that starts above the hairline and ends around the insoles.It´s exploration.
Love is not having to say "Let´s make love", because you know what the other persons wants.It´s understanding.
Love is being given an honest chance to say no when you thought you were committed.It´s consideration.
Love is both of you remembering protection.It´s responsibility.
Love is saying the perfect phrase to make a solemn embrace dissolve into giggles.It´s humor.
Love is being told "Stop and I´ll kill you".It´s desire.
Love is reviewing the damage to your living room and realizing personal effects are strewn in a clockwise pattern from the front door to the bedroom.It´s abandonment.
Love is seeing what your lover really looks like for the first time.It´s truth.
Love is knowing what time it is and not caring.It´s joy.
Love is the arms around you tightening their embrace.It´s ecstasy.
Love is seeing a new side of a person you thought you knew.It´s renewal.
Love is telling a person if you have to leave, you will let them sleep, and being told they would rather be woken.It´s tenderness.
Love is waking up to find the subject of the dream you were having asleep on your shoulder.It´s where fantasy meets reality.
Love is being there to wake your lover. Slowly.It´s sensuousness.
Love is belatedly knowing why you bothered to buy a queen-sized bed three years ago.It´s practicality.
Love is two people only taking up a third of a queen-sized bed.It´s closeness.
Love is knowing you gave the extra set of keys to your apartment to the right person.It´s trust.
Love is saying good-bye and knowing you will be back by mutual consent.It´s faith.
Love is stretching your arms and discovering the real meaning of the word "sore".It´s a lesson in human frailty.
Love is opening your medicine cabinet and finding your tube of toothpaste turned into a pretzel.It´s adaptation.
Love is sitting at the window, looking out and remembering who you were with the night before.It´s reflection.
Love is hearing the weather forecast for a winter storm and wishing you could spend it in bed with your lover.It´s loneliness.

Love is stories that will never be told.It´s personal.Love is a slow kiss goodnight.

spelling the name of disaster

This time, it was a Saturday.

A little more than a year ago, it was a Friday. I was on my way to work then, but I could no longer make it through the flooded city streets. I had to go back into the house, frustrated because I could not leave. Aside from that, the news kept me so worried because they say that in our town, the waters have gone high already. I could imagine my anxiety back then. I was staying in the city and I could not contact any of them came the afternoon. Just before the break of a new day, the rain stopped. I got home.

I came face to face, literally, with disaster. People got busy putting their lives together. It took time before everything and everyone got back to their feet.

Last week, there it went again. It prevented me from leaving, too. My flight the next day was canceled and was rescheduled due to the hateful weather condition. The disaster struck us again. Not the same area, though, but with almost and even more damage. Frank, Ondoy and the upcoming Pepeng - may it assume any name -has caused millions of property, livelihood and priceless lives.

With this sight, no matter how we ask for reasons why, the answers seem vague. Instead of asking, there is much more that we can do. We can HELP.

and PRAY.

(Photo courtesy of news.yahoo.com)

someone else

"What if the person you loved became someone else?"
-Possession, 1999

Scary.

Whether it be someone else better or someone else worst. The thought of change is something that one should stand up to when loving - because everyday it happens, and it happens from moment to moment.

What would you do if he adores you now and turns his head the minute the girl next door passes by? What would you think if he gives you only one long stemmed rose from supposed to be a dozen boquet? What would you feel if he's crazy about you and suddemly talks about how the past has made you so inadequate.

Even anticipation could not spare youu from hurting especially when you need security instead. Even knowing the person you love does not guarantee that when these changes happen it is going to be pain-free. No wisdom can shield you from the rocks that will fall upon you, nor could it hold you from falling on those sharp ones.

Change, though, should not make you love less. You can decide to persist. Unless...

you look into his eyes and see someone else.

desiderata

i am back. and i want to be back for good. i have missed my blog and so much about writing.

this is what led me home:

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others,
even to the dull and ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be
greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career
however humble;
it is a real possession in the
changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you
to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit
to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore, be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.
With all its sham,
drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.